Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Buffy S6E8 Taboobla Rat’s Ass

In which trouble brews in the lesbian witches brew.

Sharkface in a suit attacks Buffy and Spike. Who is Sharkface in a suit? Beats the fuck out of me. Some bad guy to whom Spike owes a bunch of fucking cats.

Here’s an example of a bad quip: Sharkface badguyman says “I don’t want to see anyone get hurt” as he sends his goons into to beat up Buffy and Spike. So Buffy says, “better close your eyes” and proceeds to beat the shit out of the goons. Great line, except for the fact that Sharkface would have no reason to say that he doesn’t want to see anyone get hurt, he totally does want to see many people hurt, except of course to set up the devastating quip from Buffy. See, that’s just lazy.

Tara and Willow are going to break up. Yawn. And pedofile Giles (I guess he’s not much of a pedophile anymore, is he? Everyone’s legal now. Except for Buffy’s fake sister. Ok good, the name stays) tells Buffy he’s leaving (again). Double yawn. This soap opera drama is tiresome.

Willow’s addiction to magic? A little less boring. I’d be addicted to magic if I could use it. I’d be casting spells all up and down this bitch. Fuckin ran out of pop tarts? Magic that shit up in the toaster. With some magical melted butter. Fuck yeah, magic rules.

Then Willow cast one too many spells and the whole spaz squad gets amnesia. Total amnesia. But they all remember who Mary Poppins is. Sounds like bullshit then.

While trying to remember their identities, our heroes end up making some wild ass assumptions and getting lots of shit wrong, like Anya and Giles assuming they're married. Oh boy, more fan fic indulgence. Whoopee.

Hey I never thought of this but why do all vampires know kung fu? Is it something they all practice after they get turned? Seems odd that they’d all be proficient karate masters. HIYAAAH!

Then the spell is broken and everyone wakes up to comedic and or sad effect. And then some horrible fucking music is played in that stupid nightclub which still exists. So it’s a typical Buffy episode. Some decent ideas and strange enough to give passes to ideas even if they don’t work (like Sharkman in a suit) but then they fuck it up with boring ass cheesy drama, unfunny jokes and THE WORST SOUND TRACK IN THE HISTORY OF FUCKING TELEVISION.

Hey guess what, Bob’s Burgers is on. That show is pretty all right. At least Fox is trying out a cartoon not made by Seth McFarlane for once.

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